Even though Ghana has made great strides in its efforts at getting women elected or appointed to positions of authority, including the appointment of a woman as Chief Justice, a woman as Speaker of Parliament, among other several women ministers and deputy ministers, a major hurdle in the country's feminist push, it appears, has to do with how to make men accommodate successful women.
A survey conducted by the Public Agenda reveals that several high profile Ghanaian women are either single or divorced. Reasons? The men just find it difficult to cope with high profile women. Other less successful men find professional women too formal and intimidating to approach.
Several men Public Agenda spoke to on the subject claimed that for them, a woman's success which is often accompanied by an authoritative posturing is a huge turn-off.
They will simply not have the courage to approach such women, let alone propose to them. Baaley, a journalist at Nsawam, says he will not marry a successful woman because such a woman might not get time for the family.
She will engage in meetings for long hours, and neglect her domestic responsibilities. Others were not certain.
For them a woman's profile or position in society would be considered alongside her personal qualities. Donald Nsoh, a policy analyst for trade, said "I will want to consider some key qualities such as humility and willingness to share.
If she is humble and generous, then we will move on but if she is not then we call it off."To Dennis Nchor marriage is about compatibility and if one finds a woman who shares his beliefs he may marry that person.
To him, the only issue is respect - she has to respect the man.Two out of twenty men interviewed would not be put off by a woman's success. Kwesi Afram, a chartered accountant in Osu, Accra says, "Yes I will marry a successful woman, but this will depend on her age.
The world is fast changing and the men need to adapt to the trend and accommodate successful women.
"Mark Zingbagba, an Accra-based policy analyst, also said, he will marry a successful woman depending on how she views marriage. Some choose not to respect their husbands because they feel they can depend on themselves. But, the women have no apologies to make.
To them, socially constructed roles for Ghanaian women appear steeped in the sub-consciousness of Ghanaian men such that any change that places women in a dominant position creates some discomfort for them. For some men, it is an aberration of the established social order.
Dr. Rose Mensah Kutin, Executive Director of Abantu for Development, argues that a different world is possible but it requires hard work. She says it is important that we challenge certain assumptions about women and the position they hold in society, whether married or unmarried which in reality does not affect their ability to deliver.
There is lack of understanding of the belief in the need to secure rights and opportunities for women equal to those of men, or the concept of feminism by men, particularly when it poses a different picture of what women status in society should be.
Women in power or positions of authority are often perceived as women who can't be controlled and so not suitable for marriage. Meanwhile, most men had no problem competing with women for academic laurels even at the tertiary level.
The problem really is how a woman's career success alters the power relations at both the family and societal levels.In pre-colonial times Ghanaian women were considered primarily responsible for bearing children and bringing them up, cooking, washing, and other house chores.
When women began to acquire education, most of the stereotypical roles of women had to be shared with their husbands or shifted to paid house helps.
This is a convenience that high profile couples have to settle for as women increasingly find it difficult to combine their roles as mothers and professionals.
The transition from a world dominated by men to one in which resources and opportunities are equally accessible to both men and women seems to have caught up rather sluggishly with most Ghanaian men.
Ghanaian men will therefore have to be conscientized to appreciate the fact that, the world as they knew it has moved on and they therefore need to catch up with the trends to maintain Ghana's image as a pace-setter in Africa.
Perhaps, when women's march to positions of authority assumes a level where their appointment to high office ceases to be news society will be better disposed to accommodating them.
The power relations would have been leveled and maybe men will rather than require their subordination from women, see them as equal partners whose views both in the family and society count.
Dr. Dorcas Coker Appiah, Executive Director of Gender Centre, sharing her experiences during the recent second national feminist forum in Accra by NETRIGHT, recalled it took her a long way to be a feminist as the Ghanaian woman is socialized in a different way.
However, she said that education helps one to understand who they are and what it is that they can be or do. "You get to know that you are not inferior to the man. I am a feminist because I know I am equal to the man. We are socialized in a way to accept that as a woman marriage is the key. Whether you are married or not, have children or not, believe in your power as woman."
She believes it is about time the older generation constantly engaged the younger generation and let them know that their value is more than being somebody's wife and look at themselves as being more important.
Dr. Hilary Gbedemah of the Law Institute has argued that it is legitimate for women to claim spaces and that, they can do so whether married or not. "We should realize that we are all complete and equal in our own rights. I don't see how equality can destroy or undermine you. You can be a feminist and a good Christian or religious adherent...the same with culture and so on, and so forth."
A recent media report said at the Legal Aid office, it is recorded that 40% of marriages annually break up within a period of 14 months.
The Head of Ghana Legal Aid, Mr. Earnest Mawuli Adzeke, is quoted as saying that the numbers of women, who apply for separation every week, far outweigh that out of their male counterparts.
Out of 2,786 cases reported in the year 2010, 608 were marital, out of which 420 were advanced by women and 179 by men. Meanwhile, Mrs. Angela Dwamena Aboagye, a renowned lawyer and counselor, says it isn't very surprising since the current trends allow this to be so, even with younger married couples.
"It is really sad and I'm sure the numbers would be more if a customary marriage, which forms the bulk of most Ghanaian marriages, were included." Speaking on Citi FM, an Accra-based radio station, she said that one of the fundamental reasons for divorces were as a result of lack of understanding between couples.
"Most couples get to that point when they just don't get along; their various backgrounds, orientation and ways of dealing with issues come to the fore and begin to cause problems. Sometimes these differences are not resolved properly before the marriage takes place". "The gender power dynamics," she said, "play an important and a more sinister role in marriage breakups.
As more women begin to become more educated, they become more autonomous with what they want to do with their careers, their bodies and their marriage but most men act like they are married to their mothers, in terms expecting their wives to cook, clean, wash, as well as hold on to their careers. This lack of reconciliation between couples imposes a strain on the relationship," she explained.
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